How to Apply R4 Style

When I created R4 Style, it wasn’t meant to stay on paper.
It was meant to be lived — in real conversations, in the quiet moments when you’re trying to get through the day, and in the small, steady steps you take toward your own version of healing.

R4 Style is more than a story — it’s a guide.
It helps you make sense of where you are, where you’ve been, and where you’re going next.
It’s a framework that can be applied to any challenge — illness, addiction, grief, loss, divorce, or simply that deep sense of “I don’t know who I am anymore.”

The goal isn’t to master the four Rs.
The goal is to move through them — at your own pace, in your own way.

You don’t need a plan or a perfect mindset.
You only need honesty — a willingness to name what’s real for you right now.

Ask yourself:
Where am I standing in the 4Rs?

Am I in Rock Bottom — facing the truth of what’s broken?
Am I in Recovery — learning how to rebuild?
Am I in Resilience — finding my strength again?
Or am I stepping into Reinvention — creating something new from what I’ve learned?

Wherever you are is the right place to begin.

“You don’t have to start over — you just have to start.”
 

When everything falls apart, your job isn’t to fix it all at once — it’s to breathe.
Write, speak, or sit with what’s real.
Ask: What am I feeling? What’s ending? What am I afraid to admit?
Naming what hurts is the first step toward healing.

Recovery is the art of showing up for yourself.
Try this: choose one small daily action that restores your connection to life — a walk, a call to a friend, a journal entry, a shower, a meal you actually taste.
Don’t measure progress in perfection; measure it in presence.

Resilience grows quietly.
When the voice of doubt gets loud, return to this truth: You’ve already survived more than you thought possible.
Resilience is the muscle you build each time you keep going, even without guarantees.

Reflect: What have I learned from what I’ve endured?
Every scar tells a story of survival — and survival itself is strength.

Reinvention isn’t about becoming someone else.
It’s about remembering who you’ve been all along — beneath the noise, the loss, the fear.
Ask yourself: What do I want to build now?
Maybe it’s a new career, a healthier body, a deeper community, or simply peace.
Reinvention is where you turn hope into action.

“Reinvention doesn’t erase your past — it gives it purpose.”
 

Here are a few ways to bring the R4 Style mindset into your everyday life:

 Journaling Prompts

• What am I letting go of — and what am I ready to carry forward?
   
• What does healing look like for me today?
   
• How can I show myself compassion in this stage?
   
• What small act can I take that moves me toward Reinvention?
   

 Peer Connection
Healing happens in community.
Share your story, even if your voice shakes.
Listen to others’ stories — you’ll see reflections of your own strength in theirs.
That’s what we do in the Cross the Street Book Club and Living & Thriving circles — we walk together.

Daily Practice
At the start or end of each day, ask:
Which R am I living today?
Rock Bottom might bring surrender.
Recovery might bring courage.
Resilience might bring gratitude.
Reinvention might bring purpose.
Every answer counts.

“We heal in the presence of one another — when stories meet, hope begins.”
 

The R4 Style framework is simple — but powerful.
It’s a way to move through life’s hardest chapters with honesty, courage, and grace.
You can begin again — from wherever you are, with whatever you have.

Your story matters.
Your voice matters.
And your next step counts — always.

Welcome to R4 Style.
Let’s keep walking — one R, one day, one act of courage at a time.

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